How Naked is Too Naked?

It’s hot.

The type of hot that could melt the rubber off your shoes or dry your mouth out in an instant and the smell of tarmac bubbling in the heat fills the air. You didn’t think about the summer training months, when you booked your perfect running temperature-ed autumn marathon. Now, there are intervals on the menu and you’ll most likely cook.

So you roll up your sleeves as high as they’ll go, hoping that uncovering your shoulders might be the secret to mobile air con. It’s not. The extra material just warms up your pits and makes you sweat even more. You consider looping the bottom of your shirt through the neck hole, to make a retro belly-top but even as a seven-year-old, this was never a good look. There’s only one thing for it, you’re going to have to get a little bit more naked.

But I wouldn’t walk down the road in just my bra. Is it any different to run along the pavement in my crop top? Whilst I’m at it, my micro short-shorts would be a cooler option but is it acceptable for my bum cheeks to peek out from under my running bottoms? The pros race in what looks like underwear, does that make it ok for us mere mortals to copy? Should guys be speeding around with, shock horror, their nipples out?

If you’re that way inclined, there are a handful of races that encourage you to run completely naked. But let’s be practical for a second. Do you really want your bits and bumps flopping around as you attempt a sprint finish? I can’t say I’ve tried it but middle-of-the-night dashes to the loo tell me it’s pretty uncomfortable.

At the end of the day, providing you adhere to public decency laws, it comes down to time, place and preference. On the beach, absolutely, go for it. In the city? I like to go by the rule, normal -1. Look around you, if most people are wearing shirt and shorts, I reckon it’s more than acceptable to peel off your sweaty top. But if everyone is jumper-ed up, you’re probably just showing off.